Wednesday, January 27, 2010

early valentine's goodies

awww, kitty don't dye for me--PETA will get super-pissed

happy early valentine's day! i love this time of year, mainly because of the abundance of red and pink everywhere. that and any holiday that promotes the eating of chocolates and refined sugar is mighty fine with me. damned evil marketing gurus.

i know i did this last year, but i couldn't let the holiday pass without a quick look at some vintage valentine's day cards. feel free to add you own comments!

female sexual arousal disorder is no laughing matter--run little eskimo, RUN!

second. most. phallic. card. ever...

...to this one (the heart in the shorts slides up and down)

false imprisonment...

...brandishing a weapon...

...and rather overt references to gettin' cut are no way to woo a lass

a subtle reminder: just like a free lunch, there's no such thing as free board...as if you could miss the wood reference

this card has an extraordinarily high potential for being misunderstood by any recipient of either gender, however my guess is that a guy would much rather receive this than a girl

bein' a 'bo is better than bein' a bum...and britt, iowa has the national hobo convention every year--i think i may check that out

does anyone else think of ned beatty when they look at this?

because there's nothing tastier than a heart in love, mmm-hmmmm

another card that could be seriously misunderstood--give judiciously or else you're going to have a hell of an argument at dinner

i'm thinking her being topless is signal enough

is it just the repeated reference to "screw" that makes this a valentine's day card? 'cause otherwise i'm clueless.

i think this card is threatening imminent abandonment if the recipient agrees to be his valentine--might want to think twice about entering into this contract.

s-kid? isn't he a rapper?

tweaked out girly boys must be somebody's weakness...

...or full-on gender benders

yikes! yes, yes i do, and then i want to pour bleach in my eyes to get this scary-ass vision of valentinian hell out of my brain

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