Wednesday, May 14, 2008

bad day for someone at whole foods

it has been way too long since i have gone to the grocery store for a big haul. so, after i picked up gus from school, we went to a new whole foods (actually, it is an old, crappy building that used to be an old, crappy wild oats). gus was grumpy and hungry; sophie is full-on two and just yelling for no good reason. her favorite thing to scream (aside from "MOM! MOM! MOM!") is "nnnnNNNNOOOOoooo!!!" in a lovely little crescendo/decrescendo thing. i battled these two for almost an hour to get most of what we needed, all the while trying to keep sophie away from the shelves because she looooves to throw things on the ground. i finally dragged my exhausted ass to the check-out line. on the way there i almost got knocked over by this little troll determined to get in line ahead of us. whatever.

there were only three registers going and they all had massive lines so i pulled in to the middle one, right behind the troll. sophie started her "nnnNNNOOOooo"s again, not quite as loud as before. the troll turned around and glared at her, then at me, then started complaining to the customer in line in front of her about what horrible children i have. gus was confused--what the hell had he done?--and sophie just continued with the "nnnNNNOOOooo" thing. i was initially upset--this bitch is impugning my parenting skills!--then got the joke (namely, that it was on her). then sophie must have startled her or something because she no'ed kinda loud and the troll just about jumped out of her skin and yelled, "oh my GOD! SCOLD YOUR CHILDREN! GOD!" and then left the line. when in the new line, she continued to blaspheme and fume. it was absolutely hilarious. gus started laughing, i started laughing--even sophie started laughing. this woman swore and waved her arms all the way out of the store.

maybe it was her first day off her meds? stopped smoking/drinking? i don't know. the really funny part was that i was trying to explain to gus why she might have gotten so upset and i said the she had probably never had children of her own or been around them and he was incredulous because, as he said, "but she's old." indeed.

yeah, sophie's a pill, but it did get us through the line quicker.

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