Monday, August 4, 2008

where to begin?

after a week like last week, that is the question.

rich had a terrifically emotional 72 hours in iowa with evan's family and a smattering of exposure to his own. he said that evan's visitation and funeral were both moving and perhaps the saddest events he has ever attended in his life. evan's family all spoke, or attempted to, at the service and it sounds as though it was all just overwhelming. he left on saturday to go and see his own family in st. louis--he hasn't seen most of them in years. he ended up spending time with his older brother, dave, who is going through his own rough patch (divorce), and the two of them decided that hanging out and drinking beer all night in dave's basement would be much better than tracking down the rest of the family. i think rich enjoyed being there with him. i know he enjoyed being in iowa city again (st. louis, not so much).

i haven't been to a kid's/young adult's funeral since i was a kid myself--i had several friends die while i was in high school. i can't even imagine going to a funeral for someone so young, someone who hasn't even developed fully into the person they would have been. and having had children myself, i can't even begin to put myself in cheryl or keith's position. it must truly be hell. i still feel so deeply for them. i spent most of this morning looking on the internet for subspecies of african violets with "evan" in the name--there isn't one, unfortunately--because i wanted to send one to them. i'll keep looking.

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